Stupid Cupid: You're a Real Mean Guy

Stupid Cupid: You’re a Real Mean Guy

Start in media res: Cimmerian and North run through Site-88 guided by an unseen voice as they are chased by a hoard of Cupids and (insert dangerous loose SCPs that got shipped here)

Unseen pink voice “Hurry ya bozos. We’re running out of time.”

Flashback: 9 hours ago. Cimmerian and North recollect in the infirmary after the events of Stop Picking on Me. North gets his leg patched up. They resolve that once the one-day timer on their forced shipping ends, they’ll try again and see if they still work.

A team of researchers debriefs them on their encounter with the daisy anomaly. (The audience finds out that people hit by the Cupid anomaly in Stupid Cupid can’t stay more than 20 meters away from each other until the time limit is up, or else… they get anomalously sad.) Another team cleans up the mess on the roof, collecting the seeds dropped by the daisy.

Cimmerian and North spend the rest of the night chatting until they both fall asleep.

An unseen pink voice speaks while they sleep: “Oh jeeze. These two are the bozos to break the curse? Just my luck, a joke.”

In the morning, North is made to stay in the infirmary due to his twisted ankle. Cimmerian calls his assistant to send his paperwork for the day to the infirmary.

Cimmerian and North relax over breakfast. It turns out Cimmerian knows about North’s secret identity. Mundane researcher by day, GoI fighting superspy by night. North’s ego is a bit damaged.

The pink voice suddenly addresses them, “Hello bozos!”

Cimmerian and North are shocked but not completely surprised more weirdness is occurring. The pink voice tells them that in a few seconds there’s going to be a site wide containment breach consisting of a hoard of Cupids grown from the seeds the daisy left behind. They need to start booking it to their original Cupid’s containment cell to fix things.

The voice magics North’s foot all better, cause the plot needs him to run. And the site alarm bells start ringing.


The pink voice urges them along. Cimmerian and North start running through the Site, already it is in chaos. Vines are growing on the walls. Cupids are laughing and shooting love arrows left and right. Other Cupids are dropping flowers and offering them to the newly shipped people. Daisies are coming to life and force shipping their new ships. Other SCPs are getting loose as they are shipped with each other and researchers.

<insert action packed run through the site here>

<insert Cimm and North getting captured and delayed by a group of Daisy anomalies who keep them until near sunset, along with their other playthings>

<insert dramatic flirty escape, plus pink voice coaching>

Somehow Cimmerian and North make it to the original Cupid Anomaly’s containment chamber, a few seconds before sunset. The pink voice guides them to use love magic. This time, it has to be honest relationship development.

<insert Cimm and North having relationship development somehow??? Cue love magic>

Their original Cupid walks out of the containment chamber. He thanks Cimm and North.

He tells them that if they want to save the site they have to come with him.

The Cupid manifests a cigar and opens a portal.

Cimm and North ask to where.

The Cupid says “To the place where all ships get their power.”

Unless otherwise stated, the content of this page is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 License